Kid Rock cannot obviously be taken seriously. With an album title this wacky, it is obvious that Kid Rock was either high or just delivering a practical joke in a musical sense. Regardless of that, let’s take a peek at what our own supposed rising of a musical religion looks like, and see if it makes any sense, or is entertaining.
We kick off with the title track Rock N Roll Jesus which starts with some disco like guitars and a solid drumbeat. Yes, this is actually a song. Kid Rock comes across as daggy, but then again, did you expect anything else? This is not designed to be taken seriously, but musically, it is good. Sounds like something that a guy from southern USA would do. It’s good music, but there is so much self-parody here that you will be laughing at Kid Rock pretty hard here. Good song otherwise. The guitar solo is pretty good, but it is so hard to take seriously. There is some good gospel chanting here, mind you.
If the previous track was the intro to the stupid concept of Kid Rock being a religious savior, then Amen is the next step in. It starts off with some nicely strummed acoustic guitars whilst Kid Rock seriously tells you to be grateful and say amen. Seriously, this is Kid Rock’s stupid attempt to create a serious statement, but failing miserably. It is a good piece of music, with some terrible lyrics, such as “if I get high, stop being so uptight”. The only sound we can hear in our minds is laughter at this ridiculous musical concept. Kid Rock? Devil Without A Cause was good, this is self-parody. A pure joke.
All Summer Long is the Sweet Home Alabama rip off, but is an okay song. It was Kid Rock’s biggest ever hit, and just is okay, not fantastic. The unfortunate thing about this song is that it seems to be part of the overall terrible album that is this one. It is a refreshing listen though, and the guitar solo is really excellent. It hasn’t aged well at all, which is sad. This is okay, but only okay. A good listen anyway.
Roll On starts off pretty slow, before Kid Rock puts in a more serious effort on this album about reflection in his life. Unfortunately, he still comes across as Kid Rock, which is pretty dismal. This song is neither good nor memorable, and by this point, you’d likely want to turn this rubbish off. However, this is not the end of the album, so we must keep going on here. This album was nominated for a Grammy? Okay…
Next is So Hott which is a drop tuned tune that, although sounds like having more effort put into it than other songs, does not need to be on Kid Rock’s career retrospective. The guitar riff is very catchy, mind you. It is a Kid Rock tale of lust and desire, and he wants to get said chick high. The vocal parts are very good and the song is definitely an improvement on the other rusty songs on this album. But a hit? Doubtful.
After that is Sugar which has some interesting acoustic guitar parts, before going into a heavy southern rock sort of tale which has a terrible chorus. It has some semi-Rapped vocal delivery which is actually very impressive. Still, it’s decent without being fantastic. A slight improvement nonetheless, and somewhat more able to be taken seriously. The screaming towards the end is really good, perhaps Kid Rock still has some talent? Inconclusive verdict on that one.
When U Love Someone is next, which actually comes across as an improvement, with some country Fender Telecaster riffs and some good lyrics and arrangements. It is a southern rock gospel sort of tale, with a church like sound. Kid Rock sounds like he is putting in a good effort here, although all the tracks on this album are very much identical. There is banjo here, too. For those who like trashy semi-country music, Kid Rock is your man. It’s an okay tune, but not fantastic. The chanting at the end is interesting, but unnecessary.
New Orleans sounds like trash from the start. Let’s just say that no matter how good the songs are on this album, the whole thing is brought down by the fact that the material is ordinary. Some great saxophone is here though, and a load of people join in to the rhythm of the song with Kid Rock whilst clapping. It’s a welcome change from the mostly church gospel music on the earlier part of the album. But it’s still largely forgettable really. Some cool harmonica is here, but it’s still Kid Rock, and this is a fairly uninspiring listening experience. A big yawn in musical terms, this song is very long as well.
Next is Don’t Tell U Love Me is a note, perhaps to his ex-wife Pamela Anderson. It sounds awful, but the heavy, dirty riff in the chorus makes up for it in the chorus. It’s nothing special, once again, just like the rest of this album. It is really difficult to enjoy this album without knowing that it is the real sound of Kid Rock selling out to an audience that doesn’t really exist. This is a totally different intention than what Kid Rock originally had. Disappointing to listen to.
After that is the tale of Blue Jeans And A Rosary which is another pretty awful tune about Kid Rock and a southern USA girl. It’s not exactly good or aged particularly well as a song. Sure, the sentiment is nice. But even so, this is not really good music and Kid Rock seems to care about one person on this album, himself. Rock and Roll Jesus? Yeah, nice one dude. The string section in the background is reminiscent of something The Rolling Stones would do, mind you.
Half Your Age is directly aimed at Pamela Anderson. Beware, this is an awful attempt at country music. Johnny Cash must be rolling in his grave. This is really laughable. “She’s half your age, and twice as hot,” sings Kid Rock. Rather funny, but still not worth a listen, unless you are a hardcore Kid Rock fan. Nice to know that Kid Rock has a sense of humour anyway.
Lowlife (Living The Highlife) is a heavy Fender Telecaster led song that is actually quite good. The best until last? Maybe. Kid Rock is embarrassing, but laughably so. At least he sees himself literally. A good song anyway. There is some really excellent guitar playing here, and it is ordinary, but funny.
Okay, bear in mind that this is Kid Rock. Also bear in mind that Kid Rock sold out by this point. That says a lot. If you want to hear garbage, this is a good place to look for songs that are garbage. Once you hear this album, you can use it as a drinks coaster or a frisbee. That’s how ordinary it is. Kid Rock has had great moments musically, particularly on his breakthrough Devil Without A Cause album. This is not good though. Avoid.